I went to the doctor last week because I had to get a physical done for our new insurance! I've never had so many tests done for insurance purposes before! GEEZE! As the doctor was poking and prodding me we had a familiar conversation...
Doc: "So you're 27... and you have kids right?"
Me: "No."
Doc: "But you're trying to have kids right?"
Me: "No."
Doc: "But you want to have kids right?"
Me: "I dunno..."
Doc: "Well, I suppose you still have time to decide."
I left the doctor feeling strange... a little bit like a failure in fact. The doctor made me feel like I wasn't normal. Since that visit I have been going back and forth in my mind about kids... AGAIN. I have such mixed emotions on if I want to be a mother. There's part of me that feels like I'll have regrets if I don't... and a part of me that would be just fine with it being my husband, me, and my dog forever. I feel like I'm at a point in my life where I don't fit in anymore. All my childhood friends now have a kid or kids or are pregnant. It's hard to relate. And it's lonely at times.
Even though I feel like Dan and I have tons of time to make that decision... I feel like the world around me thinks much differently and that makes me feel insecure about where I am in life right now.
1 comment:
Was it a man doctor? I've gotten that before, but my doctors who are female tell me to take my time (but to seriously think about having children by 30). I think that the doctor was just telling you that because risks to both you and the baby increase after the mother is a certain age
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