Falling Behind...

Okay, this is kind of a sentimental post today... I know, no one wants to read those, but I have let it out I suppose.  I'm feeling left out and like I'm falling behind in life.  It's a bit hard for me to explain really.  Here's how this feeling all started...

I had not talked to my best friend, Kristin, is quite some time.  That is just how it happens sometimes, we get wrapped up in other things and time gets away from us.  Anyways, after the New Year was over I decided to give her a call.  She just had a baby about 4 months ago, Andrew, so we chatted about him most of the conversation... eating, pooping, him growing up way too fast... you know, the normal things Mom's talk about.  Well, here lies the problem... I'm not a Mom. When I got off the phone I realized that I really didn't have much to add to the conversation.  Of course, I love hearing about Andrew and all the sweet things he does... and I love knowing that Kristin is enjoying her time as a mother... but all together I just didn't have much to to say about my life at the moment.

I told Dan later that night that I feel like my friends are just way ahead of me in their lives.  I look around everyday and I am overwhelmed with some of my closest friends now having babies.  Kristin, Lindsey, Rachel, Kayla, and the list goes on and on.  It makes me sad to know that Dan and I just aren't ready for that yet... sad to know that all my friends kids will be like 5 or 6 years old before I probably even want to get pregnant. Believe me, I know there is no rush, but when everyone else around you is taking that next step in life sometimes you can't help but feel like you should be doing the same thing...

Do I wanna have kids someday??? Of course!!!  But I also want to enjoy time together with Dan (just the two of us), get more established in my career, go on vacations, hopefully buy the house that we want to stay in FOREVER, take naps on the weekends, and treat my dog as my baby.  So I guess in the meantime, instead of feeling left out and like I'm falling behind I just need to enjoy the children that are around me until Dan and I are ready for that next big step...

No matter what... it's still hard to feel like the odd man out sometimes...

4 comments:

Sandra said...

Thank you so much for the sweet comment you left on my blog, I appreciate it :)

I read your post and I can understand what you're saying, it's gotta be hard feeling like you don't really have much in common with your friends anymore, but just remember that now is the time to enjoy being with your husband and doing things alone.

Once the kids come it becomes so much harder and things definitely change. A time and place for everything is what I always say....enjoy it now and when you're ready to have children, you will. I'm sure your friends love you just as much now as if you were having babies too :)

Mary said...

It's all about finding the right fit for your life *right now*. You are obviously very aware of what's the best situation for you and Dan at this stage in your life. I think this kind of awareness is so important, and, ultimately, will make you better parents when you are ready for that step.

Valerie said...

I will be more than happy to stay behind with you!!! :-)

Pam said...

Hi, K and D,j

Please listen to your friends comments. We love and miss you!
XXOO

B

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